Recently I have been going through a huge life shift. From my personal relationships to my business, I have made some major changes that have granted me the abundance I spent most of my adult life (thus far) looking for. The very first decision I made was to choose myself. What do I mean by that? I put me first. My feelings. My wants. My needs. My desires. All of it. I stopped thinking about how others felt about the life decisions I was making and did what made me happy. I did what was best for ME.
Now, I know this sounds selfish... and maybe it is, but truth be told, no one is as affected by my choices as I am. Lately, I have been investing more into my business. Both The Lemon Jar and Crumb Co. and Beyond The Lemon Jar. I spent a lot of time working on a system and I am currently working it into motion. So far so good. You know what they say... a closed mouth doesn't get fed.
Personal relationships. This is where I had to take hard look and be completely honest with myself. Admittedly, it took a good therapist and melt down or two to even begin to figure out that I wasn't actually living the life I wanted (or deserved!). I was sticking around out of what I felt was obligation. I was forcing myself to "make it work" because it was the path of least resistance and it was destroying me. I knew I wasn't happy. This had been going on for years and I was just too stubborn to see it. I felt it and kept going in the hopes that it would change. Surprise surprise... it didn't.
This past year has been such a whirl wind of change and emotions. All it takes is one moment... one interaction... one small gesture... to realize what you need to do. For me it was all three and then some to finally see my worth and who was and wasn't worthy of me. I actively took notice of who saw me as valuable and respected me... and who didn't. I let go of the people, places, and things that no longer brought me joy or served a purpose in my space. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. I looked at who adjusted to my absence and who noticed I was gone. All I can say is get ready to have your feelings hurt. Once you see people for who they are, you will never look at them the same.
If you take anything away from this post, let it be to never stay silent. Vocalize your feelings and don't settle for excuses. Just because they didn't mean to hurt you doesn't justify that they did. Do what makes you happy even if it makes others uncomfortable. It's not your responsibility to make others happy or protect their feelings. The only person who can do that for you is YOU. If your heart is telling you that something feels right, listen. Sometimes your soul knows before you do. Don't let anyone tell you that your dreams and desires are stupid. They aren't. If you really want it, you'll always find a way to make it happen. Life is as good as you make it. The people who are meant for you will always hold space for you. They don't take off when life gets heavy. The right one will help you carry it. Don't be afraid to try something you've never done before. It's often the people that show up when you aren't looking that have the biggest impact on you. That one moment could be the best decision you ever made and could change your life forever.
Seriously, just live your life as your authentic self and do what makes you happy. You'll never be disappointed. Because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
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