Head Trash

Head trash = self-limiting thoughts =, fears, and beliefs that hinder personal and professional growth.

It has always been interesting to me the way that the mind works. One minute, you can be so certain that everything you are doing and dreaming is right. Every new idea, creative surge, and crystal-clear vision... you're super excited about all of it and you can't wait to vocalize and share it with the people you love, admire, and respect.

The next minute, someone who doesn't even matter can come at you with some backhanded "compliment" or a sideways comment and create just enough self-doubt to squash the whole dream. 

Why do we allow ourselves to let the opinions of others have a say in our life decisions? I'm going to tell you a personal story that may seem irrelevant, but actually is the whole premise of my point. 

Back in 2021, in the middle of the pandemic, I was sitting outside on my front porch smoking a cigarette. It was a gorgeous sunny day in July. I remember it with such clarity because of the impact it had on me and because I remember leaving for Las Vegas two days later and it was 116 degrees. I was scrolling through the gram when a bunch of pictures and posts of these curvy, bold, beautiful women kept popping up in my feed all of them with shaved heads. I kept scrolling and thinking to myself "I have always wanted to shave my head but never did. Why? It's such a stunning look..." As I sat there and continued to dig deeper into my thoughts, I realized I had never done it because I was afraid of what other people would think. It created a lot of self-doubt. "I'm too big to shave my head". "People will think I'm weird or going through some sort of crisis". "Women aren't supposed to be bald". "It's not a super feminine look". You get it the point, right? I let the FEAR of what other people *might* think influence my decision to wear my hair (or lack thereof) a certain way. I was afraid. I'm pretty sure you can guess what happened next... 

You got it. I went in and shaved my head. I literally got up, walked inside to the bathroom and grabbed the clippers.

Let me tell you, it was single most liberating feeling I have ever had. The first pass of the clippers was the hardest. After that, there was no turning back. To this day, I still think about that moment. I remember how free I felt. The weight of other people's opinions no longer mattered. I didn't regret it. I looked in the mirror and felt beautiful. At that time in my life, I was sick. I didn't know it then and actually find out what was wrong for another 2 years, but in that moment, I felt sexy and beautiful for the first time in a long time. I never would have had that realization or even known that feeling had I continued to let the head trash consume me. 

My point in all of this is... just do it. Who cares what anyone else thinks? You deserve to feel happy with yourself and good about what you are doing. You don't need anyone's approval. The right people in your life will support you. If it's a new hairstyle, a business, a dream, or even just a new hobby- "The people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind" (Good Ole' Dr. Seuss)

Your vulnerability is the sexiest thing about you. Surround yourself with the right people and let it shine.